You want it.

I want it.

We all want it. 

And more of it.

Confidence.

In how we feel, how we look, how we show up, and how we handle whatever life throws our way.

Yet, many of us, myself included for the first 30 years of my life, lack confidence.

Confidence may be the most potent and addictive feeling out there because when we have it we feel…

• Unstoppable.

• Unfuckwithable.

• Untouchable.

Limitless.

Like we can do absolutely anything no matter the odds.

Yet, for most of us, it’s fleeting; something we experience only momentarily when the stars align.

This overarching lack of confidence fuels the perpetual cycle of negative self-talk, shame, and inaction, which, as you may have guessed, further fuels a lack of self-confidence.

The single best way to increase confidence?

Make a promise to yourself. And keep it.

In today’s Unstuck Yourself Newsletter, I’ll introduce you to the simple and proven framework to fast-track building massive amounts of self-confidence - in any and every area of your life. It’s a framework that every single High-Performer is aware of and prioritizes to help them be, do, and achieve more. 

Clarify

To begin building bulletproof confidence, you need to be clear about what specific area of your life you desire to feel more confident in.

“But Paul, I want to feel more confident in every area of my life. How do you expect me to pick just one!?”

Yes, I know you do.

I get that.

The beautiful thing about building confidence is that it has a rapid transferable effect in many areas of your life; however, to begin building it in every area of your life, you’ll benefit greatly by choosing one specific area to build it in first.

This will allow you to go deep in cultivating a strong sense of self-confidence, which, in time, will spread deeply into other areas of your life, too.

The fastest way to build an abundance of self-confidence is to commit and follow through on the promises you make to yourself. To make this process easier and more effective, I can’t stress enough how essential it is to commit to less. 

What area do you want to use as your lens for the remainder of this article?

Get clear on that now.

Perhaps, you want to feel more confident in…

• Dating and building a romantic relationship

• Public speaking and leading meetings at work

• Managing your finances and understanding where your money is going

• Applying for a promotion or new job, or asking for a raise

• How you look and feel (specific to your health and energy)

Get clear on this.

Because once you begin building massive amounts of confidence in this particular area of your life, you’ll quickly notice it has a positive ripple effect on other areas of your life. 

Commit

Are you interested or committed?

There’s a stark difference between being interested and committed. I detail the key differences between the two in a recent edition of the Unstuck Yourself Newsletter entitled, “Unlocking Your Potential: The Key Differences Between Being Interested in and Committed to Success.”

I recommend you click here to open this in a new tab and commit to reading it next.

When you’re interested in something, the experience begins and remains within your mind. Again, it’s the stuckness you experience living in Lala land without ever taking any action.

When you’re interested in something, you’re quick to make (or find) excuses that hold you back from taking action on this interest.

When you’re interested in something, you’re quick to find an easier way, or, to bail all together on the endeavor.

To be committed is a full-body, feeling-based experience.

To be committed is a state of being that acknowledges and accepts there will be both expected and unexpected challenges ahead along the journey to goal attainment.

Yet, despite this acknowledgment of the hardship ahead, commitment breeds forward momentum. 

Always. 

When you’re committed to something, you show up differently.

• Your energy, vibe, and body language carry greater poise than ever before. 

• You attract like, positivity, and solutions while repelling negativity and distractions. 

• You speak kindly and confidently to yourself while continuing to prioritize spending energy on that which matters most and moves the needle closer to your goal. 

When you’re committed, you do what you know you need to do even when you don’t feel like it.

Commence

Commence means to start.

To begin building confidence you need to begin taking action - duh.

However, for most people, this proves to be the toughest part of the proven confidence formula.

Why?

There are two major obstacles in your way. 

1. Discomfort Slows - or stalls - Action: the act of building more confidence is an out-of-comfort-zone endeavor. If feeling confident came naturally and was effortless, I wouldn’t have written this article and you wouldn’t be here reading about how to build more confidence.
   

2. Activation Energy: the amount of energy required to start something new - often referred to as activation energy - is exponentially greater than the amount of energy required to continue taking the action.

When we are contemplating a behavior change (which is an identity change), we’re overwhelmed with old patterns, limiting beliefs, and stories that keep us stuck in a place of fear and passivity.

Even though you know what to do and how to do it, it can still be quite challenging to do the thing. 

But you need to start.

And, starting small is the best path to developing massive momentum and creating an abundance of confidence. 

Start tiny and do everything in your power to control or reshape your environment to make it easy to start. 

Whatever it may be, make it incredibly simple to start.

Interested in learning how Hypno-Mindset and Performance Coaching can help you unlock limitless confidence? 

Schedule a 30-minute discovery call with me here. 

(create) Consistency

Once you are…

• Clear on where you want to build more confidence

• Committed to doing the damn thing

• Commencing action toward doing so

Consistency becomes a natural byproduct.

Assuming you’ve implemented all the action steps I shared above, of course.

That means you’re incredibly clear on how, where, and why you’ll build confidence in this particular area of your life and you’ve prioritized biting off LESS than you can chew.

The latter will ensure you’re able to follow through on your commitment to yourself with greater ease, therefore, fostering a pattern of consistent execution. 

A smaller commitment makes it far more likely you’ll follow through on the task at hand, therefore, giving you the best opportunity to do so over and over as you foster consistency and turn this new behavior into a habit.

(become) Competent

The byproduct of consistent action is competence.

As you begin to repeatedly execute your unique confidence-building action step, you’ll begin to build momentum, which will snowball and not only lead to more progress faster but also make progress easier to achieve as you begin to feel more competent in completing the task.

Now that we've committed to something, have commenced action toward it,  and begun to accumulate consistency, you begin to feel competent.

And this consistent feeling of competency lends itself to evolving into an abundance of confidence!

Consider the example of making sales calls.

• At first, cold calling someone you don’t know in an effort to get them to buy your stuff may seem daunting, to say the least.

• You may feel the natural fears of rejection and judgment creep in as you simultaneously notice your palms becoming sweaty and the lump forming in your throat.

• But after 10 reps it feels easier; there’s not as much resistance to picking up the phone and delivering your pitch.

• After 100 it feels near effortless; you’re locked in and able to access a state of flow easier than ever before.

When you follow through and check the boxes of the 5C Confidence Formula, you create a perpetual positive flywheel cycle that continues to give back and help you accumulate more confidence through the beautiful principle of compounding confidence.

Your Next Step

Don’t make this more complicated than it needs to be.

The 5C Framework can be applied to any area of your life you wish to boost your confidence.

And the ripple effect you’ll experience is priceless.

You can’t change unless you change.

Thank you for reading this week’s newsletter.

Interested in learning more about how I help high-performers just like you unstuck themselves and unlock their full potential?

Apply to work with me and schedule a coaching discovery call here. 

You may catch up on previous newsletters here. 

If you have a question about anything I discussed in this week’s Unstuck Newsletter, please message me on Twitter (@pauljsalter7) or Instagram (@paulsaltercoaching).

My email inbox is always open, too: [email protected]

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