“What are you interested in?”

Whether you’re asked this question in a job interview or on a dating app, this question is a popular go-to to generate conversation.

But I think it’s one of the most worthless and wasteful questions to ask - let alone take the time to answer.

Why?

Because the truth is you’re likely interested in a million and one different activities and pursuits, yet, few, if any, truly get the attention they deserve and you talk about wanting to give. 

The result: your interests remain a collection of thoughts and dreams in your mind without any action in the real world. 

What I care about are your commitments.

What are you committed to?

What do you lose sleep over, dream about, and work relentlessly toward achieving and becoming?

Because this is where you’ll spend all of your energy.

This is what will reflect who you are and how you spend your time; influences how you interact with me and show up.

Fuck your interests.

I want to learn everything about your commitments. 

In today’s edition of the Unstuck Yourself Newsletter, I’ll differentiate what it means to be interested versus committed to something. I’ll discuss key differences, why being interested is meaningless, and note the common practices of High-Performers who relentlessly and ruthlessly commit to becoming the best version of themselves.

It’s my assumption you’re committed to reading the remainder of this newsletter, so full steam ahead!

I’m Interested…

Interested

adjective

to show curiosity in or for something

I’m interested in several activities and pursuits.

• I’m interested in becoming a better pickleball player.

• I’m interested in becoming fluent in Spanish.

• I’m interested in playing poker again.

• I’m interested in traveling to Thailand again.

• I’m interested in eventually having a house in Costa Rica.

• I’m interested in spending more time in the mountains of Colorado.

But here’s the harsh reality of how my interests have served me and come to fruition:

• I play pickleball once in a blue moon during this current chapter of my life (even though I’m a 10-minute walk from the courts and have no shortage of people to play with).

• I’m also taking zero consistent action toward practicing Spanish.

• I haven’t stepped into a casino in two years. I live 15 minutes from a great one but have no definitive plan or date to play again at this moment. 

• I have taken zero action toward budgeting for or planning a trip to Thailand.

• I have taken zero action toward even visiting Costa Rica again, let alone researching the house building and buying process.

• I have zero plan or true clarity around more frequent visits to Colorado.

I have a hunch you have a dozen interests, too.

It’s intoxicating and addicting to think about how many interests you have. 

You get off on the dopamine rush of ruminating on your interests. Yet, when it’s time to take action on these interests, you have depleted your energy reserves so much through this interest-based fantasy that there’s nothing left to actually take action in pursuing your interests.

You remain stuck in Lala land without ever taking any action.

Thus, despite having so many grand interests, your life never changes and you end up further from achieving those interest-based goals. 

Nothing significant changes in your life unless you’re committed.

The best of the best in every domain of life are ruthlessly committed to their goals.

They’re not interested in leaving a greater impact, making more money, or achieving goals A, B, or C.

They’re committed.

They eat, sleep, and breathe the result they desire.

Are you interested or committed?

There’s a stark difference between being interested and committed…

I’m Committed…

“You’re either all in or all out. There’s no in-between.”

Committed

adjective

feeling dedication and loyalty to a cause, activity, or job; wholeheartedly dedicated.

Committed.

• To be all in.

• To have both feet in - not one foot in, one foot out.

• To be dedicated to plan A; without a plan B. 

Think of the most successful person in your industry.

Is he or she also committed to being a chess Grandmaster, elite Tough Mudder Competitor, high school football coach, and pianist.

No.

Because nobody got time for all that!

If they want to be the best, that is.

They ruthlessly protect their time and audit where, when, and how they spend their energy to ensure each action they take is bringing them close to their one predominant goal - their commitment. 

There’s a stark contrast between the number of things a High-Performer has on his or her interest list versus his or her commitment list - and the latter is what gets the vast majority of time and attention.

And, that’s important to note: you cannot be committed to a dozen pursuits because a commitment requires a depth of energy that can only truly be given to a few things. 

So, you can be committed to being the best spouse, the best parent, and the best at what you do, but truth be told, you cannot be committed to being the best in much else in your life as each of those three require an indescribable amount of time and energy.

Interested versus Committed

When you’re interested in something, the experience begins and remains within your mind. Again, it’s the stuckness you experience living in Lala land without ever taking any action.

When you’re interested in something, you’re quick to make (or find) excuses that hold you back from taking action on this interest.

When you’re interested in something, you’re quick to find an easier way, or, to bail all together on the endeavor.

To be committed is a full-body, feeling-based experience.

To be committed is a state of being that acknowledges and accepts there will be both expected and unexpected challenges ahead along the journey to goal attainment.

Yet, despite this acknowledgment of the hardship ahead, commitment breeds forward momentum. 

Always. 

When you’re committed to something, you show up differently.

• Your energy, vibe, and body language carry greater poise than ever before. 

• You attract like, positivity, and solutions while repelling negativity and distractions. 

• You speak kindly and confidently to yourself while continuing to prioritize spending energy on that which matters most and moves the needle closer to your goal. 

When you’re committed, you do what you know you need to do even when you don’t feel like it.

Take a moment to reflect on something you are or previously were committed to in your life…

Perhaps, it’s your marriage or relationship, being the best parent you can be, earning a promotion or new credential, hitting a specific impact or income goal…

Now, contrast that with how you show up to something you’re interested in.

I suspect there’s a massive difference. 

Commitment demands daily, ruthless action dedicated to the goal at large.

What’s the easiest path to double down on your commitment toward a goal?

Commit to less.

Here’s a simple, powerful exercise to help you gain clarity on your commitments. However, please remember that you committed to finishing this newsletter so make sure you read this through entirely first. 

1. Set a timer for three minutes and write down all of your goals. Let them flow like water.
   

2. Next, I want you to quickly assess - the first answer that comes to mind - your level of commitment to achieving each in the next 12 months (feel free to adjust this timeframe). 

   1. On a scale of 1 - 10 (10 being “very committed”), how committed are you to achieving this goal? Why did you choose the number you did?

3. Then, review your list and place a circle around the ones that received a nine or higher. Notice how your list shrinks.
   

4. From here, take the time to work with each remaining commitment individually to flesh out the challenges you may face and actions you will need to take to achieve this goal.

Still committed?

Notice that your list may shrink yet again.

This simple, powerful exercise is meant to bring awareness to just how little you have the bandwidth to commit to.

It’s my hope it’s eye-opening.

Interested in learning how Hypno-Mindset and Performance Coaching can help you step into a state of commitment to unlock your full potential? 

Schedule a 30-minute discovery call with me here. 

Your Next Step

There’s a big difference in the impact, happiness, success, and income you experience when you’re committed (instead of interested).

Are you committed or interested?

You can’t change unless you change.

Thank you for reading this week’s newsletter.

Interested in learning more about how I help high-performers just like you unstuck themselves and unlock their full potential?

Apply to work with me and schedule a coaching discovery call here. 

You may catch up on previous newsletters here. 

If you have a question about anything I discussed in this week’s Unstuck Newsletter, please message me on Twitter (@pauljsalter7) or Instagram (@paulsaltercoaching).

My email inbox is always open, too: [email protected]

If you found this information valuable, click here to share it with a friend.

If you were forwarded this email, click here to receive my Unstuck Newsletter each Friday.