Every year, adult lobsters go through a process called molting.

Molting is the process in which lobsters shed their old shell to make room for new growth, including a brand-new shell.

This cycle repeats regularly throughout a lobster's entire lifespan, with more frequent molting occurring during adolescence.

Stop for a minute and really allow your mind to visualize this for a moment…

…a lobster literally steps out of itself and morphs into a bigger, stronger, better version.

Fascinating, right!?

The molting process begins with a series of hormonal shifts that soften the lobster's current exoskeleton (shell).

At precisely the right moment (read: this moment doesn’t exactly exist), the lobster commits to change by slowly wriggling out of its old shell. This is facilitated by the earlier hormonal changes and the accumulation of a significant amount of water, helping it separate from the shell.

During this phase of molting, the lobster becomes incredibly vulnerable, resembling a soft piece of rubber drifting helplessly at the bottom of the ocean. It's in this fragile state that the lobster is most susceptible to premature death or serious injury, lacking its usual tough outer shell.

For the next few weeks, the lobster stays hidden, burrowed deep within the ocean floor. During this time, it has an insatiable appetite and devours as much food as possible, even its own former shell! It's estimated that the lobster grows in size by as much as 15 percent and may gain as much as 50 percent in weight during this period.

Within a matter of weeks, the lobster has regenerated its new shell.

What's truly remarkable is that if the lobster experiences any significant losses, like sacrificing a claw in a battle or losing an antenna during an escape, those parts are completely restored with the new shell.

Isn't that incredible!?

Every year, a lobster undergoes a literal transformation and upgrade as it steps into the next best version of itself. You and I have much to learn from the lobster about this growth process.

The lobster sheds its old self (shell) to become the best version of itself.

Through phases of courage, vulnerability, and surrender, the lobster achieves astonishing growth in a remarkably short time.

In essence, a lobster lets go of its entire identity - leaving nearly everything about its past self behind - and embraces a brief period of intense vulnerability before emerging as a stronger version of itself.

I can't speak for the lobster population, but I imagine the idea of letting go of everything that once protected you - the stories, excuses, and lies - to willingly enter a phase of intense vulnerability before rising to your next best self is pretty damn scary.

I want you to have that same experience.

When you delve into the molting process, it's fascinating to see how uncannily similar it is to the process of getting unstuck. It requires you to shed all that you know and are (your current identity or shell) and tenaciously work towards stepping into (or growing) a new one.

In today's edition of the Unstuck Yourself Newsletter, I'm going to delve deeper into the molting process and draw parallels to the process of unsticking yourself. This way, you can better understand how necessary (and normal) some of the stickiest and most challenging parts are in the pursuit of new growth.

You’ve Outgrown Your Current Shell

The lobster's molting process embodies a pursuit we should all embrace: consistent growth.

Every year, the lobster steps into the next, improved version of itself.

Are you doing the same?

The critical distinction between the lobster and you lies in action. Much like the lobster undergoes several hormonal changes, preparing itself for growth, you, too, undergo internal shifts that prepare you for progress.

• You conceive the ideas.

• You harbor the hopes.

• You envision the future.

During these moments, there's a surge of excitement and anticipation about how your life could be different, how it would look if you could only ____.

Even more, you temporarily move energy (remember emotion is nothing more than energy in motion) throughout your body and begin to feel and experience what this different life would be like…

Yet, you find yourself stuck in a state of inaction, restrained by the Fear JAR we discussed last week.

You’re designed and destined to grow.

Change and growth will continue to happen around you, yet, if you yourself choose not to continue growing, you’ll feel stuck in an old shell as the environment around you inevitably swallows you up!

What's crucial to glean from the molting process is this: for both you and the lobster, there's never a "perfect" time to take the essential steps toward becoming the best version of yourself.

What the lobster has mastered, and what we can all learn from, is that action (read: growth and change) is an essential part of the process.

Like the lobster, you should always be growing.

Shed the Shell of Lies, Stories, and Excuses

As the lobster internally readies itself to shed its shell, it’s in essence preparing itself to shed its former identity.

In the unstuck yourself process, this looks like shedding the lies, stories, and excuses composing your current identity, so that you can start from a blank slate.

Your identity is built upon a story - a lie or excuse you’re telling yourself.

What story are you telling yourself that’s responsible for keeping you stuck?

I’ve shared my story about my scarcity mindset as it relates to money. Here’s the collection of stories, lies, and excuses that kept me stuck in this lack mindset for far too long.

• Story: It was unsafe (and rude) to earn more money than my parents.

• Lie: I didn’t want to earn more money than that amount.

• Excuse: I didn’t need that amount of money to live a happy life.

• TRUTH: I wanted (and still want) to earn as much money as I possibly can.

If you’re struggling to take your business or idea to the next level, this may look like:

• Story: I can’t possibly earn $1,000,000 per year - the math just doesn’t add up.

• Lie / Excuse: Earning that much money would take away from my family time and be too overwhelming.

• TRUTH: I’m afraid to ask for help and even allow myself the freedom to think about having a team to help me achieve this goal.

If you’re struggling to lose 20 pounds and keep it off for good, this may look like:

• Story: I’m incapable of losing weight and keeping it off for good.

• Lie / Excuse: Every person in my family is at least 20 pounds overweight and this is just how I am.

• TRUTH: I’m afraid that I can do it and that in doing so I will lose my entire identity - which was formerly shaped around always trying to lose weight and failing to do so successfully.

If you’re struggling to find the romantic partner of your dreams, this may look like:

• Story: The perfect partner doesn’t exist. I’m destined to be alone.

• Lie / Excuse: I’m misunderstood and there’s nobody out there who truly gets me.

• TRUTH: You’re afraid to open up and share your authenticity with the world so you play it small and safe while shying away from vulnerability.

The process of moving beyond your current self to pursue your potential demands you let go of this collection of stories, lies, and excuses keeping you stuck in your current identity.

They’re not serving you.

Although you may not be responsible for the origin of the stories and beliefs you possess, you are the only person who can do something about it.

You need to do the work to understand when, why, and how the story you’re telling yourself came to be so that you can heal, reframe, and, ultimately, rewrite a better story.

I work with business owners, entrepreneurs, and other ambitious high-performers like you to help you unstuck yourself by stopping self-sabotage at the source so that you can 10X your impact and income.

Click here to apply to work with me.

Hunker Down and Do the Work

Once the lobster takes the bold step to shed its shell, it enters a phase of immense vulnerability while endeavoring to embrace its new identity. Although shedding the old self took significant effort, the most challenging part of the journey lies ahead.

This parallels your pursuit of a better version of yourself.

Initiating this transformation demands an incredible amount of courage and action. However, safeguarding your newfound identity and resisting the pull of old habits can prove to be the most formidable part of the journey.

This is where many falter.

• This is where the dieter regresses to her old pattern of eating.

• This is where the business owner plays small and returns to a familiar pattern of minimal income and success.

• This is where the hopeless romantic gives up the apps or dating altogether.

It's this stumbling that leads them to retreat, to shrink themselves, and ultimately, to exist within their comfort zone rather than truly thrive.

They merely endure, instead of striving to flourish.

Can you relate?

When you declare your intent to change and wholeheartedly commit to it, you become more susceptible to old habits, familiar patterns, and the opinions of others than at any other point. These can be likened to the predators from which the lobster must seek shelter - you, too, must protect yourself from these threats.

During this time, you need to dig in and focus on self-improvement, resurfacing only to connect with your closest confidants and loved ones.

This is also a juncture in the journey where you might be most susceptible to self-sabotage. Your old self's echoes call from a distance, tempting you like sirens, while your mind attempts to lure you back to the safety of the familiar and known.

Having a mindset and performance coach during this process helps you remain strong and on the path to unlocking your potential.

Now, this is perhaps my favorite part about the transformation process…

Devour Information to Support Your Growth

Over the next few hours after leaving its old self behind, the lobster continues to absorb water and will swell to reach its new size, which may be as much as 15 percent larger in size and nearly 50 percent larger in weight.

It’s growing into its next-best self in record time.

For you, this looks like consuming books, podcasts, courses, and coaching that is in line with the direction you desire to go as you pursue unlocking your full potential.

You cannot continue to consume the same content - social media profiles, YouTube videos, news, and other TV shows - if you wish to truly take your life in another direction and step into the next best version of yourself.

Remember the golden rule of change:

“You can’t change unless you change.”

Now, more than ever, it’s important to fill your mind with information aligned with who you wish to become. Every piece of content you consume should be heavily scrutinized to ensure it pushes you forward rather than tempts you to revert back to a previous way of thinking and being.

• Find that binge-worthy podcast.

• Delete the social media profiles that keep you stuck feeling like a shell of yourself.

• Consume an online course in a single weekend.

• Attend that live retreat, conference, or seminar.

The more you can surround yourself with positive energy, inspiration, and ideas that connect to the new version of yourself you’re stepping into, the less tempting it’ll be to want to return to your old way of being.

Trust the Process

Change can be a daunting prospect.

One prevalent fear that I and many of my clients grapple with is the fear of loss.

This might manifest as the fear of losing loved ones and close friends, especially those who might have played a role in keeping you stuck in the first place. It can also take the form of apprehension about losing parts of yourself.

When a lobster is in the process of growing its new shell, the new shell will encompass everything the old shell did, including all the familiar appendages, gills, mouthparts, antennae, antennules, eyestalks, and pleopods. It will even retain every hair, spine, and bristle!

Perhaps most intriguing of all is the lobster's ability to regenerate any lost appendages while growing its new shell. For example, in perilous situations, a lobster might sacrifice a claw to escape. After its next molt, that new claw will commence regeneration!

Every time the lobster molts, it regrows what was lost or absent - albeit in a slightly different form with its new shell.

It's vital that you have faith the same will occur for you.

Yes, you might part ways with some friends, but inevitably, you'll surround yourself with better ones as you persist in the pursuit of your full potential.

Yes, you might relinquish parts of yourself, but if that aspect of you (think of a characteristic) is genuinely meant to serve you, it will regenerate in a new way to better facilitate your journey.

After my divorce, I struggled with believing I was worthy of love, let alone, had enough love to give someone else.

It took me two years to realize that all along I had more love to give - to both myself and others - than I ever dreamt of. It has been buried behind so many repressed emotions that I didn’t recognize that love was there, ready to be shared.

I thought I lost my capacity to love and be loved, but, ultimately, it showed up stronger and more powerful than I ever could have imagined!

Even more, I lost friendships and experienced major changes in relationships with those I care about. Fast-forward to today, I have a few closer friendships than ever before and a more evolved, loving relationship with those I care for.

Your Next Step

I hosted our annual 5% Live Event last week and literally hung the picture below in our teaching room (which was really just a room of comfy couches, bean bags, and an abundance of tissue boxes).

I began our three-day transformational experience by sharing this analogy with each of our attendees. And, throughout, referenced and reminded them about where they were as we worked to help each individual unstuck themselves from a particularly sticky situation.

The vulnerability and fear you experience while trying to grow is normal.

Know that.

And, know that you’re not alone.

But the sooner you can accept the necessity of this vulnerability and begin to commit to the burrowing and consuming (of content) to expedite the growth of your new shell, the shorter and less challenging the growth process will be.

If you’d like mindset coaching and accountability to help you expedite your own molting process, you can apply to work with me and schedule a coaching discovery call here.

You can’t change unless you change.

Thank you for reading this week’s newsletter.

In next Friday’s Unstuck Yourself Newsletter, I’m going to pivot our conversation to the mind, as I begin unpacking the differences and roles of both the conscious and unconscious mind.

You may catch up on previous newsletters here.

If you have a question about anything I discussed in this week’s Unstuck Newsletter, feel free to drop me a message on Twitter (@pauljsalter7) or Instagram (@paulsaltercoaching).

My email inbox is always open, too: [email protected]

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